Sunday 16 October 2011

Emily


I've written about my friend Emily who died in 2006 on this blog twice previously, last year, and the year before, as well as mentioned her in passing on other posts such as this one about the Casson Family books. Regular readers will know that she is my motivation for raising money for Mind (and I'm waiting to see whether or not I will get a place to do a non-swimming challenge in 2012!)




The 16th October is always a sad day for me as I grieve for my friend who only had 23 years of life, although I can also feel glad that she has now found some peace from the torment of depression, and I try to remember the many very happy times we spent together and her wonderful support when I was very poorly in 2002-2003. This week has been extremely hard as we have approached the fifth anniversary of her death; I met Mr W six weeks after she died and wish very much that they had been able to meet each other.

As I've said before, Emily was a great reader and a great baker, and traditionally I try to bake something in her memory. I have many memories of her drinking earl grey tea in our favourite coffee shop in Exeter, and us sharing muffins. I have made a couple of earl grey bakes in the last couple of years, so as soon as I spotted the Earl Grey Cupcakes in Fiona Cairn's The birthday cake book, I knew that this was a recipe that I would save for this weekend.

Too bad I couldn't find my piping bag - still the appearance of the icing gave me the excuse I needed for a good cry.

Also this week I found this book of muffins which Emily gave me along with a giant muffin tin after her stay in hospital. I've not made that many things from it, but decided to make the salmon and sour cream scones to go with soup.
It's nice to do something else as well if I can. Last year I went to a John Rutter singing day. This year I was feeling uninspired until I had a text from Emily's Mum on Friday who was on holiday in the Trossachs. She'd had a pedicure and now had "Outrageous Pink Toes" in honour of Emily. I remembered how Mr W and I painted our toes pink for our first Great Swim raising money for Mind and decided to book a mini pedicure at the spa that I visited before our wedding.



Think we will light some candles tonight...

13 comments:

  1. Big hugs to you, Verity. You have done and continue to do so many amazing things in her memory.

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  2. A lovely way to honor Emily's memory... hugs.

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  3. What a lovely way to honour someone so special to you.

    All the baking looks delicious and the toes look fab!

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  4. Baking is such a beautiful way to remember someone, and I *love* the luscious pink toes.

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  5. the cakes look amazing and it's a lovely way of remembering someone.

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  6. It sounds like you have done some wonderful things this year in memory of Emily. Take Care xox

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  7. I was filling up reading this post, as my friend Rob took his own life 4 years ago in March, a lovely young(ish) man who you would have thought to be the happiest guy alive. I think of him very often and the texts he used to send me when he was feeling despair. He was also much loved by lots of people from various areas of his life.

    I will have to do something similar, have never thought of that, although one of his friends in Germany rang me on the first anniversary of his death.

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  8. The cupcakes can only be delicious, your pedicure looks very pretty, and you are lovely. More hugs for you, Verity.

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  9. Big hug to you, lovely ways in which to remember your friend.

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  10. ((((((((((((((((((((((Verity)))))))))))))))))))

    A virtual hug for you, in memory of Emily. Love the pink toenails.

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  11. Dear Verity, just read your original post about your friend. My brother took his own life in October also, the 22nd to be exact. It was more than 50 years ago and I still dread the day and month. He was 24 at the time. I share what you are feeling and am so happy to read that you still think of her and commemorate the sad day.Kay Clifton

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  12. Thank you all for your lovely comments. Those of you who have also lost people to suicide - very much love. x x

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  13. So many people would try to soldier on through that day, or supress the memories. I think it's very strong of you to honour her in so many ways.

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